New Charting

So what'd ya think?

Good Grief

Its funny really...

When it comes to how to raise your child everyone has something to say. Including me lol. I won't lie, I pass on advice all the time... But you all know this lol. So typically it doesn't bother me. Agree, disagree, whatever... We can debate it or not... Life goes on. Hopefully everyone learns something.

But there are times...

Seriously... it's like you can't make anyone happy. Either you rely too much on things passed down from friends/family... or you rely too much on what you've read from whatever source... Despite the fact that you're pretty sure you balance everything pretty well and go w/ what works for your family.

Or better yet, everything you say gets twisted around to something that's just flat out wrong.

Or they slide in little digs about you into the mix...

Sorry... stepping off my soapbox now...

Obviously having a rough week...

Don't ya know it I'm a bad mother who forces her kid to sleep too much (not just that, but I do it to keep her busy since we have nothing else to do with her), has no family involved to give me advice... forcing me resort to "guys" on the internet who despite having studied these things extensively have no real knowledge, and has people lie in wait to jump on anyone who comments on a status message.

Oh wait... but I have plenty of things to do w/ her... and do... And I have family that's involved... even if they aren't nearby. And my friends have better things to do...

Sleeeeeeeep

I was going to post about a wasted pg test... Not a complaint.. Seriously. I'm glad I wasted this test. Long story short... between my weird chart and everything I was wondering if I should... and then after nearly passing out a friend asked if I am. I knew it was a pretty slim chance w/ having had a period... (and a neg test a week or two before that) but at that point I figured it'd be safer to check. Test said no. We continue on lol.

Anyways... was going to write a whole post on that.... But now I'm somewhere between shaking my head and wanting to pull my hair out.

If you're on my facebook list you probably understand why. Once agian... Long story short...

My SFIL and his opinions on raising babies. Specifically on sleep issues. As soon as he asked me what time I put her to bed I knew it was coming... because we've gotten into it before when he let her skip a nap at their house until she was so wound up she was bouncing off the walls and crashed in his arms.

I'm sorry but not cool. We dealt with the fall out of that for days...

Now he thinks babies need less sleep that EVERY source I can find recommends... that its common sense. I'm sorry, I just don't see it.... I mean, if she slept a different amount than on the charts and did well... I'd say great. I'm sure some kids do... But w/ her that's not the case. She sleeps somewhere in the middle of what's recommended... Is developing great. Is doing great in general. And when she doesn't... You can tell!

Sorry.. just needed to vent. I know it doesn't matter one way or the other... but his attitude gets to me sometimes. I'm glad we don't have to deal with it often lol.

What A Start

Granted I turned off my alarm this morning so the later time could affect the temp... a problem we've had a lot in the past few months. I'm really going to try and stay on top of that though!

Questions

Seriously... How to ask someone, politely and without them pushing you away, if their significant other is treating them right? =[ Ok, sad face was unintentional... the baby hit the keyboard but it works. Last time we really discussed it he definately was not... but being a teen you can't tell them... well anything.

Secondly... how to bring up the whole std issue? I know she's about to go on BC and as much as that bothers me... she knows the risks and hows and its her choice. My husband brought up charting on top of that... and she is interested in that. But as someone pointed out, she could turn that around to get pg if things go badly (same w/ BC though... she could stop it on purpose). I personally think every woman needs to know how to though so slight disagreement there lol. Still as a teen already making poor choices I see why she brought it up... but it also brought to mind does she think she can stop using condoms after they prescribe stuff? I'm hoping not, but she thinks this guy will marry her eventually. Through in the whole bi issue that's been hinted at... and I don't even know where to begin. I hate (hate hate) recommending any form of contraception... but you can still catch things and I don't know if she's considering that.

Uggh. I didnt think I'd need to deal with this before my girls got older... and as far away as that is... lol.

Apologies

Ok... Should have posted this a couple days ago...

I'm officially not pregnant. Much crying to be had... but I'm doing better. My husband immediately commented on how we'll have fun trying this next month lol. And honestly, after talking to the loan people today... I'm feeling a lot better about that.

Apparently... according to our reasonable and affordable chart on the paperwork they sent... our payment each month is going to be a whopping $5. No kidding. I'm sure most months we're going be sending more than that... but still. Granted that's not counting the one still w/ Sallie Mae, but we were paying that before (which reminds me... time to head over and pay that). So we're not as bad off as we were thinking we'd be. Now he just needs to fill out the paperwork to get our tax money back and life will be completely back to normal!

Impatience & Scaring Myself

I'll apologize if this rambles... I'm tired and slightly annoyed with myself.

I told you the test was neg. I was kind of expecting that... despite all the worries and despite getting so upset over it. Unfortunately a combo of husbands comments and my chart saying that I really shouldn't start until today or tomorrow has me still wondering. I know I shouldn't worry and I know I need to wait a week to test... but everytime I log on to my chart to add something I see the number 15 by today and tomorrow highlighted and think "What if I did test too early? I could test tomorrow..." Yes... I could. But I would also be wasting a test because you know if it's neg then I'd be testing yet again in a week... (if I haven't started by that point.. you'd think I would though) in which case I'd need a whole new test! LOL

Impatient much?

Beyond that... my bday is next week. I'm trying to make the menu as Tanzanian as possible... Monday is pretty much out (other than breakfast in a roundabout way) because we're doing leftovers and then my sweet husband is cooking me dinner. But yeah.. searching through stuff and something reminded me of Fanta Passion.

For those of you who don't know this already... I loved the stuff when I was in TZ. I wish we could get it here... I've looked for it for years. But I was at my worst... You got it... While I was pregnant last time. I couldn't think of anything else. I'd sit here for hours and search for the stuff... and I just caught myself doing that. I stopped myself (I've got too much to do) but just barely... My brain is still stuck in this never ending loop telling me I need it. Coincidence? Probably. Most likely. And I will laugh at myself when I find out I'm not... Ok, no I'll probably cry myself silly... and then I'll laugh at myself..

But damn it I need a fanta passion.... Anyone willing to fly overseas?

Still Waiting I Suppose

Ok... Sorry I didn't post this yesterday, it was a pretty rough day all around (although the time alone was nice).

I tested first thing in the morning and it was negative. I told my husband and his responce? You're still pregnant. You tested too early. Test again next week." Literally those were his words. Sigh...

So I'm trying not to worry about it. Despite being past day 14 now (well chart is saying I'm on day 14 but I think its 15 if that makes any sense) my chart seems to think I'm due to start on 16... So I figure if I'm not I'll start any day now... and yes if I don't, I'll test next week. I'll definately update though!

Counting Down

Test day is tomorrow... So as you ca imagine, I'm a bit nervous. And my husband (among others) is no help.

Sunday... one of the aunties came up and asked me if I'm pregnant. I was shocked... told my husband and when he heard who it was he got this bug-eyed look and said that she tends to know. Apparently she asked him if I was before... before we announced it.

While we were discussing that he said that I have the tummy again and that it had gone away. This makes no sense though because he's saying it came back a month ago... when there's no way I'd be that far along.

Every time anything happens that could even possibly construe me being pg... he tells me that I am. Have to pee? You're pregnant. Mmm this spaghetti is great. You're pregnant. I'm tired. You're pregnant. The cat climbs on my stomach and starts purring... You're pregnant. I'm not even kidding.

On day 13 of my luteal phase... and temp is still up when it normally starts falling about now. There was one dip, but apparently that can happen during implantation... (Don't tell him that.) It actually climbed even higher today and moved my BBT ovulation date over. I manually set the real one anyway, so it hasn't adjusted that... thankfully. But it does have me worried about when to test...

Because Friday (day 15) is a fasting day. So I'm planning to test tomorrow, when a test should give accurate results. But I know if it's negative I'm going to worry (probably needlessly) because I should't be fasting if I am... even if its' not a hard fast. His suggestion (which makes sense) is that if it's neg and I feel like I'm craving food Friday morning to go ahead and eat. It makes me glad I have two tests just in case (do the wait a week method)... but I'm still nervous about that.

On top of that, I'm worrying about it because if it's neg then from my point of view we probably should not continue to ttc just yet because of what's going on... which... uggh. yeah. Note I said me... because he wants to continue because he feels that we may need that blessing (which I understand and agree to a point... but how hard would it be for me to be pregnant right now because of that stuff?). So it feels like if I'm not when will it happen? But... if it is... how hard is that going to make things? Sorry, I'm rambling, but that's about how my brain is going w/ this right now.

Thankfully this week has gone a little quicker than I expected it too. Hopefully I'll be able to get some sleep tonight lol.

Better Late Than Never

Remember a few weeks back or so... I honestly can't tell you how far as I'm still a bit blurry here... but when I wrote about the cry room? I have to share the latest development.

We had a wonderful Sunday.

Because this coming one is Palm Sunday (and the main director has to direct) they switched my husband to directing last week. *Ok over use of the word direct but not sure how to fix that at this point * So I was not looking forward to it. Alone... in the cry room again. Not fun right?

Well... we got there early. He walked us into the room and then walked out and headed over to the choir section.... and the baby flipped out. She started screaming "bye bye" over and over and then randomly would call for him. Then back to the "bye bye's" I tried distracting her with toys.. Nothing worked. All this and Mass hadn't even started.

So I decided to do it. I gathered up our stuff... got the baby... and walked out the door. To the cry room that is. We went and sat over by the choir in the last pew... close enough to the door that I could rush us out if she misbehaved.

She did so much better... There were a few issues. Another choir members family was in the row and her daughter kept trying to play with mine...who doesn't understand how to be quiet yet lol. So a couple times I had to pull the baby off of the girl or shh her for talking. And then another family came on the other side w/ a baby of about the same age... and had a book mine wanted. Lots of pointing and talking occurred. But other than that lol... She sat and drew for a good while and it was not as bad as I thought it would be.

It only lasted until the homily though... as my dear husband took her out to the foyer to "keep her quiet" (I think he wanted to walk around honestly). Sometime around then my FIL showed up and decided to take her off my hands... and took her back to the cry room... Where they stayed all of maybe 5 minutes before he brought her back out lol. Unfortunately there was a miscommunication though... I didn't realize he took her up w/ him to receive Communion (the little ones are blessed) and was worrying about getting her back to do so and was pretty frusterated at the end because I thought she'd missed out on that.

Anyways.. I talked to my husband afterwards and we've decided to cut out the cry room... but sit around adults lol... most likely w/ my inlaws.